Thank you for all yu'r nice little msgs. and emails... !!
How can I ever ever begin to be the friend you are to me. I have been a poor friend lately and I feel so crummy about how seperate I've been with those closest to my heart. Just so you know ~ There is never bad weather when a friend like you is around whether it’s sunny or stormy, the horizon is always bluer!You are a light source for life, meaning, you are only as harmless as your life light shines (your life shines very bright). Please… never let that light dim. To take a focus away from something overwhelming… we need a very strong and bright source of light. We sometimes cover our eyes when a light is so strong, not because there is malice in the light, but because we’re afraid to finally see the truth of our problems. That can only occur, when life shines more brightly, than our problems. It’s really nice to receive your attention and friendship as a gift.
You make my world nicer!
Can you please accept my sincere apology for lacking the basic essentials of friendship , these past few weeks ?
I have NO good excuses , i've been so sick and feeling a little low - in the karma of life but that will eventually pass just like each day. Life will be okay for me , i'm just struggling. My close friend Moe is dieing of liver cancer and it's not pretty.I've been really trying to work around this the best I know how and there just hasn't been a way for me to cope easily ..Its really hard for me.
Can you please accept my sincere apology for lacking the basic essentials of friendship , these past few weeks ?
I have NO good excuses , i've been so sick and feeling a little low - in the karma of life but that will eventually pass just like each day. Life will be okay for me , i'm just struggling. My close friend Moe is dieing of liver cancer and it's not pretty.I've been really trying to work around this the best I know how and there just hasn't been a way for me to cope easily ..Its really hard for me.
Before coming back into glorified prison ( hospital ) I had All my running and driving for my own health and treatments , surgeries , working and Craig ... so much happening.etc. The list doesn't end.
I really miss you , too.
Luckily I have yu !! I have so many circles to make every day , just doesn't seem like I accomplish a 1/3 of what I should be. But .... Im trying hard ...I try like a sonva bitch.
Time heals ~ isn't that the only remedy in life?
I've let my real friends down lately. I've disappointed them , I haven't been myself , or I don't connect with them often.
What do I say .......
Im fuked.
We aren't meant to "do" this journey alone. It takes just moments to connect with someone who shares faith and journey of illness , whether it be emotional / physical and daily pain.I've been there. I've heard it. I've prayed it. And now... I've even had encouragement to keep the fight.Together..OohIsay.
I've let my real friends down lately. I've disappointed them , I haven't been myself , or I don't connect with them often.
What do I say .......
Im fuked.
We aren't meant to "do" this journey alone. It takes just moments to connect with someone who shares faith and journey of illness , whether it be emotional / physical and daily pain.I've been there. I've heard it. I've prayed it. And now... I've even had encouragement to keep the fight.Together..OohIsay.
Pain without purpose threatens to deplete me of my joy, hope and sometimes even " My " trust in God.
My world is full of sin and I cannot change that.
My world is full of sin and I cannot change that.
Since Adam took the bite of the apple, we became susceptible to sin and difficulties in our lifetime. For many of us, although we hope for healing, either through a miracle or a new medication, we have grown to accept that perhaps our illness is "our thorn."
"Please take this away!"
"My grace is sufficient..."
"Please take this away!"
"My grace is sufficient..."
If I am going to live with pain, however, the only way to come to a peace about it is to let my spiritual beliefs be used in my life in any way that seems fit. I rest and wait for the purpose to be revealed. Each of us can find a purpose in the pain.When I was diagnosed with my illnesses , this seemed like a tall order.
"What! Find purpose in this ~ I refused to because that was accepting the fact that it’s never going to go away." ... Don't panic ~ I have somewhat accepted pieces and parts , still workin' on the whole.
My feelings are natural and I have a certain amount of grieving to experience , maybe not exactly the same grieving but I have inner connections.I believe!
What ever type of ~Pain , Pain is undeniable. We will all suffer in this world.We have each been given the opportunity to become a "wounded healer" and reach out to others who are in pain, who feel alone, isolated, and abandoned.
Our society is built upon the premise that you put others down and build up yourself. Jesus tells us to put ourselves last, and build others up with encouragement and love. By using our pain ,we will begin to focus on others, and the pain will become more of a tool and less of a thorn.
We've come together for emotional and spiritual support.For me, it has taken a combination of medical treatment therapy and faith, plus plain old hard work!
I need connection for dealing with my health and mental manic issues.
It is so comforting to read of others who have struggled with many of the same issues I have.
Even tho you don't have my ick and ooUoo you are special ~ Thank you so much for being there for me. I can't find the words.
I tell you this to offer my ear and shoulder to you when you struggle with issues. I look forward to hearing from you. Life has its challenges, but it also has its gifts.I wish you sunshiny days.
Friendship is perhaps the best gift. Illnesses are only part of what has been taken away from me. Some valued parts of my life but the hole is not empty.
I know that there have been so many times when I just want to be the world's version of "normal" but here I am not in the "normal" and still ~ Find love and support without the pressure to over do. I only have to get used to the idea that I'm safe and comfortable.
Friend... grab your umbrella and let's go singin' in the rain!
I know that there have been so many times when I just want to be the world's version of "normal" but here I am not in the "normal" and still ~ Find love and support without the pressure to over do. I only have to get used to the idea that I'm safe and comfortable.
Friend... grab your umbrella and let's go singin' in the rain!
Jade ~ xx
